The Pope Hates Me?

Before I could read the newspaper, turn on the radio, or tune in to CNN, the news had reached me from not one, not two, but from THREE emails. Yes, it is true, the Pope, John Ratzinger, AKA Benedict XVI, hates me.

Yes, I am talking about the Pope’s somewhat recent document entitled, “Responses to Some Questions Regarding Certain Aspects of the Doctrine of the Church,” with its peculiar wording. Newspapers and Blogs alike were quick to react negatively to Ratzinger’s sharp pen. The document, just like most papal documents and Councils, does not bring anything new to the table; rather, it reaffirms what the Church has always believed. A great example is the council of Trent. Faced with dissention, the Roman Catholic Church affirmed doctrine questioned by Luther. This council affirmed its fuller canon of scripture for one, unlike the protestant supposition that books were “added.”

Ratzinger used the term “defect” in this doctrine. Basically, he affirmed the pre-Vatican II tenet that the RCC is the True church, and that all others outside of it are errant. He never said Protestants are going to hell in a hand basket—in fact, he has stated he is in full compliance with Vatican II, particularly Decree on Ecumenism: Unitatis Redintegratio, which states:

The children who are born into these Communities and who grow up believing in Christ cannot be accused of the sin involved in the separation, and the Catholic Church embraces upon them as brothers, with respect and affection. For men who believe in Christ and have been truly baptized are in communion with the Catholic Church even though this communion is imperfect. ...it remains true that all who have been justified by faith in Baptism are members of Christ's body, and have a right to be called Christian, and so are correctly accepted as brothers by the children of the Catholic Church.

Even the “liberal” Vatican II thinks of Protestants as separated brethren who are missing out on the fullness of the Catholic Church. The missing pieces and/or additions means they are not complete…they have, uhhh, DEFECTS! Doesn't every denomination feel at best they are closest to the Biblical picture of Christianity, and that others, while well intentioned, have defects?

Having just lost one of the greatest Popes of all time, and having enjoyed the person I met in Pope Benedict XVI: A Biography of Joseph Ratzinger, I am not ready to dismiss the Holy See just yet. And it would be wrong for me to. As a protestant, most of my life I was taught that the Catholic Church was more than defective—in fact, I believed that Catholics, while submitting to the papacy were not capable of salvation. At the evangelical Bible college I attended I took a class on modern cults. Yep, my professor lumped the RCC into this bunch, likening the pope to David Koresh. And that professor is mad about the use of “defects” in the document. I don’t want point out the RCC splinter in their eye as I affectionately caress the log in mine!

Second, I need the pope. Without him, how can I be a “protestant?” How can I enjoy rock and roll worship, media presentations in church, and emergent pastors who answer to no governing body besides theologically feeble, loose, and morally complacent associations? Dr. Steven Long sums it up best (read it! written like a proof). The Protestant reaction to the document made me grin, having just enjoyed Dr. Long’s insight. We really needed the pope to stir up some controversy!

Anyway, I applaud the document for its transparency and agree with the Metropolitan Kirill of Smolensk and Kaliningrad (Russian Orthodox) who states, “It is an honest statement. It is much better than the so-called 'church diplomacy.’ For an honest theological dialogue to happen, one should have a clear view of the position of the other side…”

Boys Will Be Boys?

In 2002, “Elizabeth Gilbert found The Last American Man living in a teepee in the Appalachian Mountains.” So states David Von Drehle in The Myth About Boys, Time, July 26, 2007. I don’t intend to summarize or critique this incredible article; rather, I just want to talk about boyhood, and encourage you, dear reader of my blog, to click on the above link and read it yourself.

I am left with my glass half full after reading the article and a sense of fatherly duty. It would seem, that after all the number crunching of the past ten years and statistical comparisons between boys and girls, that (1) Americas boys are being bred more dimwitted, while girls are excelling like never before, that (2) boys are an emotional, “scarred and disconnected mess,” and (3) boys are trading in their natural rugged masculinity as a result of (1) and (2) for a pathetic sense of apathy.

There may be truth to all of that, but read the article…maybe it’s all been grossly exaggerated and there is hope for my new little boy Ezekiel and his big brother Malachi.


Call me a caveman, a Neanderthal, a chauvinist pig, but I don’t want, “off the rails feminism,” or the “cold-calculus of this global economy,” to claim my boys. I want them to be immersed in the escapades detailed in The Dangerous Book for Boys. I want them to catch fish with homemade lines, build fires with magnifying glasses, hunt for snakes in my backyard, get into the occasional fist fight, build tree houses out of rotten wood, step on rusty nails that are sticking out of that rotten wood, play with swords, throw worms at girls, and give me a run for my money!

It shouldn’t be hard…I can already see the ornery masculinity budding out of ruddy little Malachi’s DNA as we speak. But I have competition—GI Joe, He-Man, and the Dukes of Hazard has been replaced by Sponge Bob, the Fairly Odd Parents, and Drake and Josh.

I love my boys. I love wrestling with Malachi and teaching him all my old tricks. It comes back to bite me now and then when a wet, slobbery finger plunges wet-willy style into my eardrum, but I know that my sweet little girls will have two constant advocates as long as they live. I don't expect to find them living in a teepee somewhere in the Appalachians...a musty tent in the backyard will do for now.