Family Men

Being a husband and father is by far the most rewarding experience afforded to man while on this earth, in my opinion. The Church, recognizing the beauty and importance of marriage a liturgical rite--a sacrament; that is, in effect, a method for imparting grace on the individual.

Similarly the act of child bearing and rearing is a lofty miracle. For theists, like myself, we see ourselves privilege to work alongside God in the act of creation.

I do not necessarily consider myself qualified for either role: husband or father. It is my opinion that nobody in and of themselves actually possesses or attains to worthy credentials. God and community supplement where the individual is lacking.

This joyous responsibility is also veraciously daunting and often strips one of self confidence, particularly in the role of protector. Protecting my family is one of the most fulfilling tasks. As I was perusing through the pictures on our digital camera today I came across the picture below. I was engulfed in emotion as I recalled what took place in the photo. Our youngest daughter, Gabs, held an unlit Morning Glory Sparkler in her hand. As soon as the sparks started shooting out, she realized the harmful potential grasped in her ruddy little fingers, burst into tears, and threw the sparkler on the grass. Only when she was tucked in my arms would did she stop crying and try to participate.

But every up has its down. The possibility for failure and the latent repercussions are extremely daunting and scary. I am always second guessing myself, asking, "am I doing an adequate job at protecting my family?"

As many readers may or may not know, in just five days I will be jobless. With no future employment solidified, and this being the only source of income for my family, it is easy to feel as if I am negligent in the role of protector. It is in moments like these that it is so necessary to stumble across the picture above!

Now, I know we will get through this difficult time. I just hope that in months to come I will look back and realize that it was easier than it felt at the time, and that my family felt as little discomfort as possible.

Date Night

The past few days Sandra and I have been listening to an series of lectures on CD put out by Kimberly Hahn. Basically, Kimberly and her husband both grew up with an Evangelical worldivew. They both attended Gordon Conwell University, a bedrock evangelical university, and both are exigetical masters.

After writing a reasearch paper at Gordon Conwell on the subject of contraceptives Kimberly became convinced that while this is not a topic addressed explicitly in the Bible (becuase it had not yet been invented), the Bible suggests to be open to life. Kimberly sided with the Catholic Church's position on the matter, and eventually her and her husband did the unthinkable...converted to Catholicism.

Whether or not I agree with Kimberly's doctrine is not the point of this post. The point is, that my wife Sandra, and I have been open to new life. At the age of 27, I have four kids. This is not standard in the US--I am counter cultural. Contraceptives aside, Kimberly undescores thoughout the CD that children are a blessing of God. "The reward for God Ordainded sexual union comes nine months later as husband and wife have to pick a name."

Tonight Sandra and I had a date night. It is the first time in at least five month when the two of us left the confines of our house together and alone. As we ate dinner, alone at last, it seems that our conversation for themost part revolved around the kids. Each peice of conversation, brought joy and happiness. While it sucks sometimes only getting going out once or twice a year, and it sucks that our money is budgeted to expenses other than "fun," the truth is, it only sucks to the person from the outside looking in on our family. And my wife, a stay at home mom, in the words of Kimberly Hahn, "is changing culture one diaper at a time."